Don’t poison the children

Marriage break-up and divorce have regrettably become an integral part of our modern way of life. Sadly, these days they seem almost as commonplace as the exchanging of vows to love and honour each other for eternity.

Okay, it is futile to argue that people should remain in a loveless relationship. Yet, the huge number of failed relationships says something is seriously wrong with our values and expectations.

Every bust-up inflicts scar tissue on those who once lusted after each other but now cannot stand the sight of their former heart throb.

Worse, it is so often the children who pay a disproportionate price when love turns to hate.

Just how twisted people can become when disillusionment colours a soured relationship is emerging from court cases over custody battles.

A really sick trend has been identified in which one or both partners make false claims of sexual abuse. This is not say that abuse does not happen and certainly in no way suggests children should be left exposed if real abuse is a threat.

Yet, how sick have we become when a parent can coach a child into uttering false claims about alleged abusive activities by their partner?

This is happening in courtrooms with embittered parents apparently mindless to the immense mental damage they are causing to vulnerable young people.

How is a child supposed to lead a normal adult life with false accusations of parental abuse lingering in their minds even if such notions have no basis in reality?

In a situation that beggars belief a woman will still have custody of her children five nights every two weeks even though she coached her 7 year old son to claim unspeakable sexually abusive acts were perpetrated by his father. The judge ruled that he found the claims to be preposterous and were motivated purely by the woman’s malicious desire to hurt the man with whom she conceived and raised the children.

The claims truly were preposterous and are not worth repeating here. The point remains that the vindictiveness that so often accompanies failed relationships is being used to mentally poison children for the remainder of their lives just to satisfy an urge to hurt a former loved one.

It is so unutterably sad.

For the sake of the children one can only hope that parents try harder to build bridges rather than walls when they encounter difficulties.

It is no doubt a forlorn hope but surely we should not surrender lightly?