On ya bike, pal!
There was a time when Lance Armstrong could ride a bike. Really well. But then his ego got in the way and he figuratively went head over the handlebars.
Proving that he was truly a man of special abilities, Armstrong took to lying and cheating with a gusto that made his passion for cycling look like a faded love affair.
Like outstanding athletes who achieve the rare feat of representing their nation in two elite sports and are hailed as dual internationals, Armstrong paled his prodigious seven Tour de France titles into insignificance by becoming the greatest doping cheat the world of sport has ever seen.
Truly a very talented individual. Just somewhat misguided.
But it is beyond passing strange that Armstrong is now contemplating a re-emergence into the public eye by teasing that a major expose interview is in the offing with Oprah Winfrey.
The art of spin at which Armstrong proved himself such a master has been employed with no holds barred to whip up public interest in this possible tell-all.
The backdrop to this intriguing if rather repulsive initiative is that Armstrong apparently wants to be able to compete again professionally in triathlons and other cycling events.
To do so he must gain approval to enter events that adhere to the World Anti-Doping Code. This code offers cheats a reduction in their sentence – Armstrong has a lifetime ban – if they make a full confession and offer full details of their actions and accomplices.
But in an extraordinary twist to the tale, Armstrong has apparently let it be known that he would first need assurances from the US Justice Department that he would not face prosecution for lying under oath.
Isn’t that just a hoot? One of the greatest liars under oath the world has ever seen now craves protection from the very system he has shamed so persistently for so many years.
Honestly, the arrogance of the man can hardly be understood for it is beyond any human scale. That Armstrong even thinks anyone could watch him cycle without feeling revulsion for his past sins is difficult to conceive.
That he thinks he is entitled to forgiveness suggests a complete estrangement from reality.
Instead of trying to twist and manipulate public opinion as he has done so blatantly in the past, Armstrong ought just fade quietly out of view and allow the sport he has tarnished time and the opportunity to recover.
For, in nothing that has happened since he was outed, has there been any suggestion that Armstrong is contrite for his transgressions. And a mere confession is not contrition. And even if he did offer an apology, how could anyone ever take it seriously given how utterly he has lied in the past?
No, pal, slink off into the distance and leave us all alone. You are not worthy.